back in november, before social distancing, quarantine and zoom became a regular part of my vocabulary, i almost spent a stupid amount of money bought a last minute plane ticket to san francisco to see jenny slate on tour (emphasis on the almost). i didn’t buy the plane ticket. i remember it so clearly. mercury was in retrograde… “how could you remember that” you ask? because on that day i had locked myself out of my bathroom when up until that point, i had no idea my bathroom even had a lock! but of course, on a morning when i had hit snooze one too many times and needed to get ready fast, i woke up to a locked bathroom *RETROGRADE*. it was on that same day that i had seen that funny gal, jenny slate was going to be stopping in san fran for her book tour and she had a few tickets left for her show that coming weekend… on impulse, i thought to myself “buy the ticket, book the travel and pack your bags.” but as my conscience would have it, i started second guessing myself. “it’s too much money. it’s too last minute. it’s only for one night.” and then i read this article on manrepeller.

“For you, Aries, the stars predict a month that enters with a bang. Venus in Sagittarius at the start of the month has you itching to get out of town. This is the time to embark on a grand adventure.”

A GRAND ADVENTURE. could this sign BE any more obvious?! so i scoured the internet for last minute deals on flights to san francisco. i texted a friend telling him that i might be coming to town and to clear his calendar because i’ll be in san fran for one night and one night only! but then my conscience, my sweet, level headed, logical conscience told me to sleep on it and make a decision in the morning. so i did and when i woke up, my bathroom door was not locked and the flights to san fran unsold. i won’t bore you with the internal back and forth of “should i? i shouldn’t.” that i tortured myself with but you know how this ends, i went against my horoscope, i didn’t buy the plane ticket and i didn’t get to see jenny slate.

so why am i telling you this? because last night, i was supposed to see jenny slate live, at the largo. i had made plans with a friend, bought the tickets and waited patiently for our “girl’s night out” with jenny slate. if i’m being honest, i’m more upset about missing this than i am my own birthday! i don’t really know why i felt the need to write this… i think i just needed to vent or share the slight regret i’m feeling for not buying that DAMN PLANE TICKET. either way, i’ll be listeng to largo by fiona apple for the next few days to sulk.

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